19
Feb

The train people

The train people are those who are daring enough to open their eyes and see the trains that pass through “their station” and jump from train to train to train until they find the one that was meant for them. During this journey many questions arise and they have to be very special people. I wonder what are the attributes of the train people?

1. What happens when you know you can do whatever you want and you can have whatever you wish for?

2. What happens when all you believe in is yourself and only yourself, and this person never disappoints you?

3. What happens when you realize that the dream of accumulating knowledge is useless because even if you are the happiest of all learners, ready to learn at each and every step you make, when you realize that all this will never end, just when you die? Should you strive to reach for such a dream as accumulating knowledge until you die or should you stop and figure out some other dream?

4. What happens when you realize that the happiest moments of your life were the ones when you managed somehow to make people laugh (by laughing I understand “a drop of happiness in their life”)? Should you go on or stop and think about another way by which to reach your happiness – other than focusing on others’ happiness?

5. What happens when you know how to act and how to dress to obtain exactly what you want and when you have it you realize that the journey was so much better than the result? Should you start another journey?

6. What happens when you admire a “perpetuum mobile” sooo much that you become one and sitting still just doesn’t match your conscience anymore?

7. What happens when you know yourself so well that you get bored of who you are? Should you just change because you have reached such an amazing level of “knowing yourself”? Or maybe just accept the boredom because, after all…there are so many people that just wish they knew themselves sooo well?

8. What happens when you find happiness in food? In cooking or in eating? Should happiness come from an accomplishment that our body does? Or should it come from an accomplishment that has more to do with our souls or brains than with our bodies?

9. What happens when you are aware that you are in the wrong “life train” but you just can’t “snap out of it”? Should you force yourself to jump and hurt your body or should you stay until your brain becomes a tomato?

10. What happens when you have always dreamed of having kids and then you do some math and figure out that you can’t afford to raise a kid? Should you just go for it, and have one? Is that selfishness? Should you wait until you can afford to raise one or resign to the thought that you will never be able to have one and “full stop”?

11. What happens when you dream of having a house which is also going to be your home and the system tells you that you can’t afford one? Should you just move in another country where you can afford a house, which will not necessarily be your “home”? or should you stay at “home” and live in someone-else’s houses for the rest of your life?

12. What happens when you realize that you have used only 25% of the knowledge you have accumulated in the 4 years of university? Should you just be thankful for the beautiful years and the patience you’ve built by listening to things that now respond to the name of “nonsense”, or be angry that you could have spend those years by doing something more significant and joyful for yourself?

13. What happens when you were born in a sheep care-taker family and decide you could become more but why give up the peacefulness of the life you have from your ancestors?

14. What happens when you fall in love again and again and you associate love with drunkenness and all you want is to wake up and be sober again? Would you be losing a world or gaining one? And then when you are sober you realize that actually, you have never been in love, it was all in your head: endorphins and melatonin doing their job when you were lying to yourself thinking you were in love. Would that make you want to be sober or love to be doped again?

15. What happens if you decide to take your life because it will end anyways? Will you do it for yourself or will you NOT do it for others? Or maybe you will snap out of it and decide to live the damn life and take some anti-depressives…which actually could lead you back to wanting to take your life?

16. What happens when you are so sad that you keep staring in the air? You just feel your body isn’t yours and the staring is all that matters? Will you stop because the other look at you like you are a freak or just keep staring because it’s so peaceful?

17. What happens if you are so “likeable” that everybody wants you in their life except the persons that you consider likeable, who are afraid of you? Will you just go on and scare them away or stop being likeable and change yourself for the ones that are likable to you?

18. What happens if you don’t feel like getting a job? Will you just do it for the money or to be “in randul lumii”, or would you rather prefer to be a beggar and have every dear one hate you? Or maybe you would just start to think that normality is what you should strive for and try to become a rat in the race, just to be normal? Should you be ashamed that you don’t want to be a CEO?

19. What happens if you have an idea and nobody else believes in it but this idea is all you dream of every night? Will you just accept to lose your motivation and give up your “nonsense” or will fight for it and spit in the face of “de-motivation” and …in the face of the others…the non-believers and do something for your idea?

20. What happens if you are sooo angry that you feel like screaming? Will you just do it “because” or will you keep it inside because in the society it would look awkward to scream in a …shopping center for example? Is it important to scream when you feel like it?

21. What happens if you just can’t talk and explain what you are going through and others force you to? Should you just ignore them or explain to them that you “don’t know”? Or maybe should you just invent something to feel and look “stable”? Is it so bad to be seen as a little bit mad? Weren’t all geniuses a little mad?

22. What happens when you figure it out that life is something unique and you have to choose how you want to live it? Will you just believe in destiny and let it be? Will you invent worlds after death to go to? Or will you just have the damn guts to CHOOSE?

The train people do have time to think about all of these… and hopefully make wiser choices than the people who are in the train stations, paralyzed by the fear to just jump in any train. But probably the train stations people have more silence in their head. I would never choose silence! What would you choose?

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